Beating Insecurity in a Relationship
Dealing with an insecure person is probably one of the most demanding and frustrating tasks one has to do. Lots of patience and understanding is needed to deal with these people. However, what if you’re the one undergoing this insecurity? You are fully aware that the tumultuous emotion which strikes anytime of the day is causing a chaos in your own love story. You don’t want that feeling; you swore to yourself to steer clear of this relationship wrecker but you can’t seem to start and you don’t know how. Read on and get the details how to combat insecurity to resuscitate your relationship before it ends up in shambles.
1. Cut out with that Paranoia. There’s nothing more tiring than having an active imagination involving betrayal every second and minute your partner is out of your sight. Do yourself a favor, relax, trust your partner and give your mind some rest. Have you ever tried sitting in a rocking chair? Sitting in a rocking chair is just like worrying, it gives you something to do for the meantime but it gets you nowhere.
2. Stop Making Conclusions. Your partner arrives home late these past few days. He/She has this unfamiliar number in the cell phone’s last dialed number but doesn’t have the time to send you a message or call you every hour of the day unlike before. Therefore, she/he’s seeing someone new. However, before you hire a detective to follow your partner’s whereabouts stop and take time to think things over. Have you ever considered the idea that your partner may just be rushing a project in the office that’s why he/she always comes home late? Or maybe a friend used the cell phone to call someone? And maybe even if he/she wants to keep in touch and report to you all day, he/she can’t seem to find the time because of the non stop meetings everyday? Ask first before you conclude. Besides, some distance between you and your partner is healthy.
3. Trust. Trust is very important in every relationship. A relationship without trust isn’t bound to last. Spare your partner from the non stop interrogations and nagging forcing him/her to admit all your suspicions against him/her. It sure is exhausting to reassure your significant other that it was just a plain dinner with friends, your phone doesn’t really have a signal, and lastly, you are not avoiding his or her calls. If you really have faith in your partner, asking the same question after asking it just a few minutes ago just means that you really don’t believe what he or she just said a while ago.
4. Self-pitying is Unhealthy. Stop wallowing and thinking that there’s only you against the world. Quit stressing yourself with the idea that your other half will leave you for someone else because the other one is smarter, more good looking and richer than you. While it is inevitable to feel self-pity once in a while, self-pitying to the point that it’s becoming an emotional blackmail already to your partner is overstated and detrimental. Be careful. Your self-pitying might become a self-fulfilling prophesy.
5. Talk and Be Gentle. Talking to your partner about how badly you feel toward things creates a world of difference rather than attacking and bombarding him with questions. If you have to fight, fight about issues and don’t attack your partner personally. Don’t put all the blame to your partner because of your insecurities as it will create a big hitch in the relationship. Have a mature approach when discussing things rather than nagging and accusing your partner all night about how awful you feel and how he aggravates it more.
Confidence and being secure in yourself goes a long way in making your relationship strong. Sometimes, it’s the little things we do that drive our partners away. A little consideration and love goes a long way.